Northern Decider

Evidence against the decline of the US as a superpower: Americans' ability to say anything with a straight face. Yes, Russia and China are good at this, too, but do not yet have the top to bottom mastery on display in the US -- from the craftiest high-level political operative to the common American dumbass. Rarely a better example than the support of Palin. What I've learned from both spinners and credulous corkheads:

• being a governor is just like being president... a mini-president!
• alaska doesn't have a lot of people, but it has a lot of land, and that counts for... something; and besides, small populations do not matter, unless the state is Vermont
  
• a governor is COMMANDER IN CHIEF of the state's national guard, which counts for both military and commandery-in-chief experience
• a governor is an expert on international affairs if the governor's state borders on a separate country, such as Canada, unless the state is Vermont
• because it's so executivey, governorship is better experience than senatorship, but only up to a point... it counts more than double senate experience, but then senate experience also works in reverse once you get much past a couple dozen years, so, 4 yrs senate: worthless! 20 months governor: awesome! 21 years senate: even awesomer! 35 years senate: too much, omg, wtf, lol!
• a state pondering secession is engaging in admirable old-timey patriotic thought, just like our founding fathers did every day after reciting the pledge of allegiance, unless the state is Vermont
• family values.... actually, there's too much for me to learn here, as I have no clue what this is supposed to mean! I will have to do some more research and get back to this one.
• anyway, when McCain gets mini-raptured straight to heaven moments after delivering his visionary inaugural address, Sarah Palin is going to be the Best President Ever!